Ground zero – Connecticut…
The palate full of books was left right outside the downstairs door, and as the truck pulled away the wrapping was quickly torn away. One by one the boxes made their way inside. The first move was just inside the door, the next up the two flights of stairs to the place that they would be staying as they await their journeys towards awaiting readers.
I consciously didn’t think about what was inside each one until I had carried the 15 cartons up to my safe, warm and cozy resting spot. I stacked the boxes up against the wall far away from any possible exposure to heat or humidity. Now in their final destination of the day I would glance at them entertaining the visualization of what was inside. Boxes stacked and surrounded by all manner of mailing paraphernalia brought a smirk first then a sigh followed by a victorious smile.
Making sure, just one more time, that they were all stacked nicely, I made one quick trip downstairs to double check that I had all of the paperwork. I brought it all up and closed the door to the room. I stood for at least a minute or two just looking at what laid there in front of me.
There had been such excitement and anticipation of this day, building each day as the actual delivery approached. Any delay would just magnify the need for me to remind myself to relax.
Ok, so they are here, are you relaxed now, breathing a sigh of relief? No, not so much. The waiting had built to a fever-pitched excitement, which blended with at least a twinge of anxiety. A mountain of work behind us and another one that had just come into sight. We had to get past the first one to clearly see the next.
Wow, 700 looks like more than I could imagine, or maybe it looks like less, I’m not sure. The thought presents that I probably have more productive things to think about than to be scrutinizing the amount of space that 700 books should occupy. Always a detail to focus on and in fact analyze to the state of minutia. Seriously?!?
I had been planning this moment for weeks, make that months. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out which train of thought to go with to arrive at making a productive move, now that they were sitting in from of me. So what would you do at such a time??
Exactly…I just sat there and turned on some music and cleared my mind of all things big and small, related or not. I breathed in, I breathed out, and finally made it to that space between a thought, and then another and another. Ok, that’s better…. It hits me, yet once again, that inside of my head, at least…less is better.
All the cares, concerns, worries and need to organize will be addressed, but for right now I would bask in the rays of peacefulness, joy and contentment.
I then emerged from the peaceful solitude of my mind to reality as it was. Much to be done, but this time not with a revved up over-excitement or anxiety, but with a quiet inside, you know, the one that reminds you of the important stuff and gently whispers…”it’s all good!”